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Dear Think,

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Dear Artemis, I really want to learn more about your system. I’m getting sick and tired of this job and it would be very nice to work from the comfort of my home and make that kind of money. I’ve already put the down payment on my new Ford GT at Vantage Motors, so send me the info so I can start stuffing my pants with CASH instead of paper towels.


Dear HOT AND HORNY

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Dear Nikki, Wow! I don’t think I’m man enough really. I mean, I’m sort of tired right now. But thanks for taking the time out of your busy day to personally write me. I’m very touched. But I went to your website and found it’s not actually free at all. So I didn’t subscribe to your service. Stay in touch though! Hope to hear from you soon.


Dear THINK Magazine

I was wondering where is Think published? I was under the impression that it’s a Singapore magazine but then I see many email and web addresses for the Czech Republic. I’m just curious. Thanks for your time. – Laura

If by “published” you mean where the editorial wizards cast their literary spells, that all goes down in our Bugis crib. We print the book in a secret underground Singaporean fortress about an hour from here. But right now, I’m writing this from my bed.


Dear Think Magazine

I have to agree with several readers who have written in about the writer Joe Bodia. No slam on Joe Bodia, he has a strong voice, but his stuff doesn’t seem to fit in with the general tone of Think, which is – how can I put this politely – severely whacked, demented, beyond the pale and likely to have you all shackled and committed within what I predict will be a few short months. I, too, believe a local writer would be a better choice for the all-important end article. And, as one recent letter pointed out, there should be no shortage of qualified writers here.

Thank you for your continuing alerts on the ongoing robot threat and replicant infestations. My defence system improves daily, thanks to you. – Alertly yours, Pat Gallagher, Holland Village

Recently, Joe flew out to attend our annual company Christmas party. Before the party was over, Joe had a) vanquished the bottle of Jim Beam he got as a Secret Santa gift, b) defeated our VP of sales in an arm-wrestling match, c) made out with not one, but two editorial interns and d) showed us an easy way to con a bartender out of $50. Sorry, but he stays.